Four girls turn Four!

Yesterday we had a GREAT day for the girls :)

Our day started beautifully with Sabbath and a wonderful church service. Then the kids had Adventurer's. They enjoyed it very much.

We came home and TRIED to get the girls some rest. They knew what the evening had in store for them though. Bug and Peanut did fall asleep, but Duck and Diva would not.

Finally it was time to go. We got all the kids in the car and headed out. When we got there, the girls got SO excited! And as their friends began arriving they just got more and more excited. Build-a-bear is such a GREAT place to have a birthday party! They handled having FOUR birthday girls SO well too! :) EVERYONE had a great time too. Bug, Peanut, and Diva all chose to make kitties. And Duck made a pink Teddy Bear. When we were finished at BAB, we headed downstairs to Gloria Jeans and gave the kids their DELICIOUS cupcakes and juice boxes while the adults enjoyed something to drink too.

I had such a great time watching the kids. The girls had SUCH a great time, their little faces were so bright. Bug found some Hello Kitty accessories she was petting. She clearly wants them, I may see about getting them for her when she is in the hospital. And maybe an outfit for each of the girls animals too. Surprise them all!

Tonight we did Quesadillas for dinner since Bug loves them SO much! And if you can believe this, my daughters asked for YOGURT instead of cake!! NO CAKE MOMMY! So we did Birthday Yogurt and family gifts tonight for them. I figured they were all caked out! LOL In the last week and a half we've had cake three times!

Tomorrow I'm planning to take them out to breakfast too. :)

Tomorrow is there official birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUG AND PEANUT!!!!

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Reading Challenge Book Reviews February 21, 2010-February 27, 2010

Summer, by Karen Kingsbury:
100+ Books (7/100), Support Your Local Library (4/50), New To Me Christian Author (2/20)

My BFF had borrowed this series from the Library, and although she LOVED it, I had no plans to read it. I had a list of my own books that I wanted to get through and I didn't feel that they fit in my "plan." But then one day I needed something a little lighter to read. She had just finished THIS book, which is actually the second in the series, and she suggested I read it. I'm glad I did. I am now in the middle of the third book, and I am going to get the first book from the library this week, and will have to either get the fourth book by special order from another library or buy it because for some reason this library does NOT have it.

This book is about the Baxter family and their challenges. A large part of the story revolves around Ashley who is pregnant. Her ultrasound reveals that her baby has a fatal birth defect. She does not want to believe it and prays for a miracle. She also asks her family to pray for a miracle in the form of a misdiagnosis or a miracle healing. She is advised by her well meaning sister to have an abortion, as her unborn child would have a life of no more than a few hours. Ashley refuses and it causes a great rift. Over time Ashley's child's condition is re-confirmed and she comes to accept the diagnosis. Her child is born and...

Sorry, I NEVER reveal the ending!!

IN PROGRESS:
-Someday, by Karen Kingsbury
-Soldier Dead
-The Bible

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B90, Day 38: He Made EVERYTHING

Scripture: Job 38:4

"Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation? Tell me, if you understand."

Observation: The Lord is speaking to Job and is challenging him and basically putting him in his place.

Application: How can I complain about my sorrows and troubles when God has been there since the beginning of everything. I haven't got a clue what it took for God to create the Earth. My troubles seem small in that picture. I know God can handle my problems!

Prayer: Heavenly Father, please watch over me and my family. I know you can handle all of my problems. After all, you created the Earth!

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Thankful Tuesday

Today I am thankful for:
-My Father in Heaven who knows all, has all the power, and provides unending comfort to me in my time of need. I know if I lean on him, he is there for me.
-My incredible daughters, who no matter the circumstances they rise to the occasion! No matter how many doctor's appointments they have to go to, they continue to spread joy to everyone around them with happy smiles on their faces.
-My wonderful Best Friend, she keeps my head above water. She reminds me to "Let go, and Let God handle it" and she is always there with a shoulder, or sometimes that single tissue. :D
-Bug and Peanut's Daddy, for providing for them without question, staying involved despite the distance, and being a good friend to me.
-My church family, for their support, their love, and their prayers.
-The chickies, because they are the chickies! :)
-Quiet time to read God's Word.

I hope you all have a blessed Tuesday. :)

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B90, Day 37: I know HE lives

Scripture: Job 19:25

I know that my Redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand upon the earth.

Observation: Job says this to his friends during one of his speeches of sorrow.

Application: I have always loved this verse, the promise held within it. God is there, a living part of our lives. At the end of it all he will come here and stand on this Earth.

It's a powerful statement and a powerful belief. It helps me when I question myself too much.

Prayer: Lord, thank you so much for the promises you have given us buried inside you Word. Thank you for the grea comfort your love provides me.

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B90, Monday Morning Check-in, Day 53

I am writing this on Sunday night so that I don't forget.

I am working on day 37 right now. I fell so far behind. I am just working hard on reading whatever I can whenever I can. These last weeks have been insanely hard for me, but I WILL NOT give up. God's words are giving me strength.

I am in Job right now. Job has ALWAYS been a favorite of mine. A story of patience and faith in the face of seemingly unending adversity. I hope to have patience and faith as well. :)

I hope that in a week I have a MUCH better report to give.

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Reading Challenge Book Reviews February 14, 2010-February 20, 2010

1984, by George Orwell
100+ Books, Support Your Local Library, 451 Challenge

WOW... So I finished reading 1984 this evening. And I am so glad I re-read this. I read it 18 years ago as a high school freshman and have thought to read it again several times. It was worth it!

This particular version was not edited to American spellings, and honestly, I enjoyed it. I believe that some of the phrasing and slang was unchanged as well if I remember the notes correctly.

I am chosing not to do an overall review of the book but instead to focus VERY narrowly on one particular piece of the book. I wrote this up quickly by hand during the course of reading the book because it struck me SO strongly, and I decided that this is all I really want to say about 1984. There's so many other reviews out there. So here goes...

I first read this at the age of fourteen. Long before i ever had my first sexual encounter. With so much of Part II devoted to the discussion of sex and how the deprivation of sex leads to better Party members, I don't know how a class of young kids could truly understand it.

The idea of denying sexual release to give more energy to the Party members for Party purposes (such as the Two Minute Hate, Hate Week, etc.) makes sense now that I understand how much energy can be released with a good sexual release!!! But how would an average 14 year old know that?? So therefore, how would most 14 year olds get this book fully?

Still, it was a GREAT GREAT read and I'm SO glad I read it!!

How Starbucks Saved My Life, by Michael Gates Gill-100+, Buy One and Read It

This was a great, fast, lighthearted read about a 64 year old white guy down on his luck who finds himself suddenly working at Starbucks. He learns respect for himself, his Partners, and the Guests.

Mike, as prefers to be called at Starbucks, fills the book with memories of his childhood and pre-Starbucks life.

I found myself DEVOURING this book, IN my local Starbucks!! Loved it.

In Progress: Soldier Dead

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Revival Through 40 Days of Scripture Memorization

Today was a GREAT Sabbath!!!

My favorite part though was AFTER church. Our Pastor is doing a great series, Revival Through 40 Days of Scripture Memorization. We are learning a Scripture for each day, that are important verses.

We of course are free to add in other verses that are of value to us. I'm really looking forward though to committing to memory the verses that Pastor has given us.

I enjoy this church, the church family, and the Pastor so much. I LOVE the great programs that have been brought to our church. :) I am growing SO MUCH here. I am so grateful to God for bringing me to this place.

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B90, Day 36: The Queen

I am deviating a bit today. Rather than doing SOAP I'm doing a free-form blog.

In Esther, I love that Queen Esther is willing to risk not just her title and lifestyle but her very life for what she believed in. She knew that saving the Jewish people from annihilation rested on her shoulders alone. She didn't say no and hide the truth. She didn't say, "it's just too much for me." She held her head high and walked forward to ask the kind to save her people.

Queen Esther is a great example of living without regrets and doing the right things regardless of the consequences to yourself.

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B90, Day 35: Sometimes it's hard...

Seriously, this was some good reading, I really enjoyed Nehemiah. But I just couldn't nail down a verse to SOAP on. Sometimes it's just not there. Sometimes I just don't have a verse that jumps out or speaks to me. And in this case I decided not to go crazy trying to find one. READING the Bible is more important to me at this point!

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MRI scheduled

SUCH a difference from scheduling Bug's MRI, LOL.

The sedation nurse called this evening to review the health assessment to ensure Peanut was healthy enough for sedation. After determining her to be healthy enough, she said she'd send the paperwork up to scheduling and they'd call me TONIGHT. She told me that I could choose to do the MRI at the other facility, and explained the differences between the two, which are minor, but did give me cause to consider what I wanted to do.

In a matter of less than an hour scheduling called and we were able to get an appointment fairly soon. I opted for the same facility that did Bug's MRI, the main facility. Hopefully we'll have the answer soon. :)

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MRI called

WOW... The doctor works fast!! LOL

MRI called today and did the initial health survey for Peanut to start the process of clearing her for sedation. :) This is GREAT news.

I totally spaced on calling Bug's neuro today, but before I go to bed I'll call and leave a voicemail for the assistant, she can call tomorrow and talk to BFF who's been fully approved now for discussions.

On another note, the medical supply company that is providing the oximeter for Bug has been very helpful, there was some mix-up, but the therapist is coming out tomorrow and is going to fix it all, set up the machine for us, and FINALLY Bug will be on her oximeter.

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Another Trip to the doctor

Okay, tonight I took Miss Peanut to see our WONDERFUL pediatrician. You know I just LOVE a doctor that sees patients at 7:30 at NIGHT. Anyway, the reason for the appointment was to request that Peanut have an MRI of her brain. See, I know I'm a bit paranoid sometimes, however...

There is a surgery happy ophthalmologist wanting to practice on my Peanut. And I don't feel like it's fully explained yet. Plus, when Bug's neurologist called and told me about Bug having Chiari, many of the symptoms that he mentioned, Peanut had. The more research I did, the more I realized, that Peanut NEEDS to have an MRI and TRY to rule it out.

Chiari COULD account for her vision problems. Chiari COULD account for a lot of things, or she could be Chiari-free. And I don't know, but that is the problem, we NEED to know. I need to know that we are NOT operating on her eyes when they aren't the real problem in the first place!!

The doctor is a very down to earth woman, who doesn't blow me off. She listened to me, and agreed with my reasoning. She said she would work her end on the MRI referral. Meanwhile, I am free to pursue having her seen by neurologist if I want to. If I choose to go that route, she will authorize the referrals.

I am going to call Bug's neurologist and see if he will see Peanut. I don't know that he will, he is a specialist in Epilepsy, and Peanut doesn't have Epilepsy. But I'm hoping that he will take her anyway just because he sees Bug and I don't really want to have multiple neurologists! IF Peanut DOES have Chiari, I KNOW I will insist that she see the same neurosurgeon. My thought right now, I would LIKE to have her seen by the neurologist to make sure there is someone who really knows what to look for when the MRI is done. Having someone I already have a rapport with would be nice too!

Well, I'm off for some much needed rest!!

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Mid-February Reading Challenge Check-in

Okay, so here's where I am at on my challenges:

The 2010 Support Your Local Library Challenge-
My goal is 50, currently at: 2 with 1 in progress

Christian Non-Fiction Challenge-
Challenge is 10, currently at: 0 (oops...)

The Colorful Reading Challenge-
Challenge is 9, currently at: 1

The Chunkster Challenge-
The level I am aiming for is 3, currently at: 0 (but that's okay)

100+ Reading Challenge-
Challenge is 100 books minimum, currently at: 3 completed, 2 in progress, falling WAY behind on this, I need to play a little less Wii and read more! LOL

Buy One and Read it in 2010-
Challenge is 12, I am at: 1. This is actually very much on track for 1 a month. The BUYING part is easy, the reading part is the challenge! LOL

New-To-Me Christian Author Challenge-
Challenge is 20, currently at: 1.

451 Challenge-
Challenge is 7, currently at: 1 done, 1 almost done.

HERE is the entire reading challenge post. I really wanted to do the challenge(s) because I feel like so much of the time I spend time on the computer when I could be doing more challenging things like reading.

I need to get back on track with my reading :)

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B90, Day 34: He IS good

Scripture: Ezra 3:11

With praise and thanksgiving they sang to the Lord:
"He is good;
his love endures forever."
And all the people gave a great shout of praise to the Lord, because the foundation of the house of the Lord was laid.

Observation: The people are praising God as the rebuilding of His temple begins.

Application: The people are praising God because they realize that he STILL loves them. Despite all the mistakes of themselves and their ancestors, God still loves them. His love endures forever. It's easy to forget that when life gets tough and lately, there has be a lot of tough times for me. But remembering this verse helps. He is good. His love endures forever.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, thank you for showering my family and me with your un-ending love. thank you for the subtle reminders that you are there, always with us. You are great and I know you will use me for your glory!

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B90, Monday Morning Check-in, Day 46

A day late and a dollar short.... Well, my POST is anyway.

But my reading, well, I'm on Day 34... The last 2 weeks have just been impossibly hard on me, I have allowed myself to stray from The Word too much. But this Sabbath I was blessed with good health for myself, and all the kids, and was able to attend church. It really helped me refocus.

As I said in last week's check in, my Bug is facing some pretty serious health issues. We saw her neurologist last Tuesday and it's actually worse than I had expected or hoped for. I know many of you are already praying for us, and I beg you to continue. I truly believe in prayer, and I know Bug, our family, and the doctors caring for her need prayers. Since I don't want to FILL my check-in post with Bug's health concerns, I invite anyone who'd like to follow her story to visit her Caring Bridge page, just register and send me a quick note to let me know who you are. Bug's Bridge

As for my reading, I'm not giving up, I'm not planning to end late. I am going to do what I've done before, read multiple days at a time. I'm planning to read at least 2 days worth a day, whenever possible. And I will not skip any days if I can help it. If I have a slow day and can read more I will. I am hoping to be fewer days behind next time I check in :)

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B90, Day 33: Pride

Scripture: 2 Chronicles 26:16 (partial)

But after Uzziah became powerful, his pride led to his downfall.

Observation: Pride=downfall. Pride is bad.

Application: A healthy self-esteem and sense of satisfaction in a job well done is one thing. True pride, boastful pride, to the point that you put yourself first, even above God, is another thing. And it will always lead to your downfall.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, please help me to not be full of pride. Help me to rememer those that helped me and supported me, loved me, and got me there, wherever "there" may be. Most especially, help me to remember to put YOU first Father.

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It's been a rough week

Okay, so I realized I basically haven't blogged in an entire week. So here's what's going on, short version:

We had the appointment with Bug's neurologist, and she has the Chiari and Syringomyelia and it's BAD, worse than we expected. It will require surgery. That's about ALL I know though until I meet with the neurosurgeon later in the month.

But it's left me absolutely wiped out. I just have been physically and emotionally drained. I feel like I'm finally getting myself back.

I'm behind on EVERYTHING right now. But it's okay. I will catch back up, and when I fall behind again, and I will, it'll be okay then too, because I will catch back up again.

I know everything will be okay, I have God watching over Bug and I and her sister Peanut too. :) We have INCREDIBLE friends who make sure that we are taken care of.

God is GREAT! And I know he is using this and us as a way to show his glory! :) Satan, you are going down!!!!

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Reading Challenge Book Reviews February 7, 2010 -February 13, 2010

Currently Reading: 1984 by George Orwell, pretty close to done, don't think I'll finish it tonight though, but you never know :P. (2/13/10)

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My blog is BACK

WOOHOO, I love my pretty, peaceful, purple blog!

:)

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B90, Monday Morning Check-in, Day 39

Okay, I am on Day 33's reading... Nuff said.

It has been a stressful week of trying to keep calm and do what had to be done. I asked many of you for prayers for both my daughter's health last week, with very little explanation as to WHY. Well, here's the why.

Peanut's I explained, there's some eye problems, and a surgery happy eye doctor that I disagree with.

Bug on the other hand... Bug has epilepsy, she needed an MRI to rule OUT any tumors or malformations in her brain causing any of the seizures. Since we saw such improvement with her medication everyone, including her neurologist, expected the MRI to come back clear. It didn't. She has a Chiari Malformation. This may or may NOT be contributing to the seizures. It's very unclear. It will probably require surgery, and we will be having several appointments in the coming weeks.

Due to this diagnosis and looking up the symptoms of Chiari there was a realization that Peanut has MANY of the symptoms, including her eye problems. So we are getting Peanut into the Pediatrician to ask to have an MRI done on her as well as it is the only was to diagnose a Chiari.

So needless to say, my week has been filled with dealing with phone calls to doctors, the girls dad, my parents, research, work, and somewhere in there trying to relax a little. I have been wound up to the point that I pretty much got sick. Friday night I was in pain.

I am going to just read as much as I can at this point. In many ways this week may be a little slower. Despite all the appointments, I should have more time. I can bring my Bible to appointments, and because of the appointments I have a couple of full days off work that I frequently do NOT have.

Thank you for all the prayers you've already given the girls and I. I truly believe in prayer, and I know with God watching over us that the girls and I will be okay. We have a great support system here at home, and AWESOME friends online too! :)

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To my Best Friend:

Sometimes, I think I don't tell you Thank You often enough. You welcomed me into your life, and then into your home, to stay. You love my daughters as if they were your own. Whenever the "bad" news has arrived, you've ALWAYS been my first phone call (or text message).

When I called you at 1:30 in the morning, you answered the phone and calmed me from hysterical and crying to just crying. You never said a word about what time it was, or what you needed to do in the morning. You DID ask me if I would be getting enough sleep before I hit the road the next day. You knew before I said it that I was going to make the drive.

In October, you knew, before I ever walked out the door, what the doctor was going to say. You told me later, it hurt you to let me leave without you, but someone had to stay here. You held me while I cried, and then helped me get to work in one piece. And then you helped me educate myself, fast. You helped me make our new reality not feel so frightening.

Two weeks ago, you were as confused and upset as I was, and you encouraged me to get more information, NOT to feel pressured by the letters coming AFTER the person's name. Before I long I knew what to do next, I knew how best to advocate for what needed to be done.

Last week, when I texted you the news, you didn't respond with upset, you responded with a hug and a name to contact for support and advice. And again, you helped me learn what I needed to and turn this even NEWER reality into something I understood, and getting the help needed.

You are ALWAYS there. I know God put you in my life for a reason. He knew what was to come, and He knew that you were the right person to help me.

THANK YOU BFF!! You are the best and I really appreciate you being there for me. I know the girls love you SO much too. You really are the best friend I could ask for. :)

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Reading Challenge Book Reviews January 31, 2010-February 6, 2010

The Scarlet Letter, by Nathaniel Hawthorne
100+, Library, Color, 451

Ahhh, it took 2 weeks to finish, but I have finally completed The Scarlet Letter. I have actually been wanting to read it for years, but it's always been put at the bottom of the list. The 451 Challenge was the real impetus for me to finally read it! Although I found the language to be difficult for me to read, I did manage to finish. The first several chapters seemed to be mini-biographies of key characters, although the timeline of the story continued to progress throughout these chapters. At times I found this aggravating, although it definitely gave me a deeper understanding of those people. The later chapters were more well rounded. Though the writer still tended to concentrate on only two characters at a time in a chapter. It is a very peculiar style. By the time you reach the point of revealing the identity of the second culprit behind the crime leading to the existence of the Scarlet Letter, I really was NOT surprised. The ENDING took me a bit by surprise. But I still thought it a good ending. Overall, I am glad I finally read The Scarlet Letter, although I don't know how soon I'll re-read it!! :)

Now Reading: 1984 by George Orwell-100+, Library, 451

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Falling behind again

Seems to be the story of my life. Eventually I'll catch up with all my reading, but as crazy as my life has been with the girls health issues and work, I've just about found it impossible to get enough reading done this week. I will sit down and do some Bible reading later, try to get at least ONE day's worth done. And then I'll probably take a bath to relax my poor body which has been really really hurting. BFF picked me up last night and bear hugged me and you should have heard the snaps running up my spine!! She then had me lay down and popped me a ton more. I felt WAY better after that. Just all the stress of the last week built up in my spine.

I am about half way through 1984 now, and I am LOVING it. This is a more "English" version (versus an Americanized version). I love it. It is so much more interesting as an adult who understands the themes better than it was as a young teenager.

Well, I hope you all had a great day. I'm actually going to finally get dressed and go out for a few necessities, bread, milk, etc. :)

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My little puddle of water

Let me tell you a story:

Once upon a time (because all good fairy tales start this way...) a little EMT name Nique had a friend who had an Xterra. Her friend loved their Xterra, they called it a little block of caramel because it was squarish and caramel colored. Eventually Nique and her friend came up with silly nicknames for all the colors of Xterra's, like puff of cloud (white), spot of sunshine (yellow), patch of grass (green), campfire pit (orange), blood on the move (red, and sorry, we were EMT's).

One day Nique and her at-that-time husband decided they needed a new car. They wanted an SUV, they were going to buy another brand, S. Nique liked brand S, had a car from them already. But the sales people at S treated her VERY badly when she went to look, she left very upset. She meant to go to the T dealer, but her driver missed the turn and she ended up at the Nissan dealer and Nique said, ooooh, Xterra's. I want to look here. Nique quickly fell in love with a little puddle of water (blue) and just KNEW it was the right car.

Then the dealer started scaring her with numbers. Nique likes numbers, but not these numbers! Somehow Nique knew this payment was too big. Everyone around her tried to reassure her that her and the husband could afford it, they both had good jobs. "But what if something happens and one of us DOESN'T have a job??" Oh that won't happen they reassured her. So in the end they bought the little puddle of water. It would take 6 years to pay off, but it was worth it.

Unfortunately, everyone was WRONG. Barely 2 months later, Nique had no job. She managed to get a new job withing a few weeks, but at MAYBE a quarter of her previous income. Then Nique and her husband joined the ARMY. They had to leave the puddle of water behind. But at least they BOTH had jobs again.

About a year later though Nique was out of a job again. Believe or not the Army let her out... She was PREGNANT, and would soon find out that she was having TWINS! :) Good thing she had the puddle of water! But, with all the added expense would they be able to afford the payments with only one income? They struggled, had to get a few deferrments, missed some payments.

In all, their final payment should have ended up being about a year later than originally intended. But that didn't seem too bad at that point. But Nique just wasn't satisfied by that. So she did some math and figured out what they needed to pay to pay the Xterra off ON TIME. It was A LOT of money, but they worked on it and were doing it. Sometimes they couldn't do it, but the nice thing about paying extra was that the loan company always was saying they didn't owe as much or as soon.

Now Nique and her husband realized they couldn't live together and they separated and divorced. And Nique was sad, she had to let him keep the Xterra because he couldn't get another car because of the loan on the Xterra. But they worked out a deal that she would get the Xterra when it was paid off. This just made her MORE eager to be sure it was paid off on time. He has to pay the bill, but Nique can pay more. (And Nique does).

The Xterra WILL be paid off on April 1st, 2010!!!!! :) :) :)

Nique is doing a HAPPY DANCE though because in LESS THAN TWO MONTHS, her daddy (oh yeah, daddy is line one signer on the loan LOL) will be holding the pink slip to the car!!!!!!!! WOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! :) :) :)

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B90, Day 32: Lighten my Burden

Scripture: 2 Chronicles 14:6 (partial)

No one was at war with him during those years, for the Lord gave him rest.

Observation: God gives Asa a break from all the fighting because he is doing what God desires.

Application: God will lighten the burden in your life when you walk his way.

Prayer: Lord, Help steer me onto your path so that I too may have a lighter burden.

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Temporary Changes

Please bear with the HOPEFULLY temporary changes to my blog. The site that hosts my usual blog template is experiencing some difficulty and I had to QUICKLY get a new template up and running! This is a nice and fairly simple one that I was able to find quickly. :)

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B90, Day 31: God's Love is GREAT

Scripture: 2 Chronicles 5:13 (partial)

"He is good; his love endures forever."

Observation: The people of Israel are singing this at the completion of the temple Solomon built for the Lord.

Application: Given the recent events in my life, I needed to read this verse now. He is good and I know his love is forever.

Prayer: Lord, guide me, lead me, give me strength, and help me make the right choices. Please be with the doctor's I am entrusting my daughter's care to that they will be able to help them both. Shine your love down upon my daughter's and be with them now and in the coming weeks and months as we figure it all out, and make treatment decisions. Help them to feel your great love. I know your love is forever, help them to feel it too.

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B90, Day 30: God has a plan

Scripture: 1 Chronicles 10:13-14

¹³ Saul died because he was unfaithful to the Lord; he did not keep the word of the Lord and even consulted a medium for guidance, ¹⁴ and did not inquire of the Lord. So the Lord put him to death and turned the kingdom over to David son of Jesse.

Observation: God gets pretty angry that Saul doesn't take Him seriously so He sees to it that Saul dies.

Application: God has a plan for us, but we have the free will to do what we want to do. God will deal with us as he sees fit though.

Prayer: Heavenly Father, Help me to follow the path you have set before me and do as you desire.

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Bug's MRI results...

Well, yesterday Bug's neurologist called with the results of her MRI.

It was NOT clean and clear as expected. :( Bug does NOT have any tumors (since everyone asks this right away). She does have a Chiari Malformation.

What is a Chiari you may ask? It's where the cerebellum in her brain has formed improperly and is protruding downward toward the opening in her skull by her spinal column. This website at Children's Hospital Boston gives some pretty good information about Chiari but no pictures. This site Conquer Chiari has a GREAT visual of a NORMAL cerebellum and a Chiari. So that should help you understand what is going on in my Bug's brain!

The neuro said the Chiari COULD be causing some of the seizure activity, but he firmly believes she has both Epilepsy AND Chiari. Mainly because all her previous testing was SO conclusive for the electrical signatures for a seizure, and also because the medication she takes is HELPING.

The biggest current concern with Bug's Chiari is that on the MRI they already could see pockets of fluid, which is a symptom of the Chiari preventing the normal cycling of her cerebro-spinal fluid within her brain and spinal cord. This very likely will require a shunt to be placed. For that reason we will be meeting with a FANTASTIC neurosurgeon later this month.

Due to some information I have found that there is a SMALL chance of it being genetic (and even her neuro said that yesterday), and the fact that Peanut's Ophthalmologist wants her to have eye surgery, I am getting Peanut into the Pediatrician next week to talk about having her have an MRI. I want it done ASAP. She exhibits some of the signs of a Chiari, including eye problems. I do NOT want to operate on her eyes only to discover that her problem never was her eyes but was her brain. Fortunately, I think the pediatrician, who already knows I am not comfortable with having Peanut's eye's operated on, will agree with me.

For now though, we are just in status quo mode for the most part. Bug doesn't know anything is wrong with her. I have to watch and call the neuro if certain symptoms present themselves, and make sure she doesn't ride any roller coasters (wasn't gonna happen anyway LOL).

I definitely ask everyone for their prayers to help us get through whatever is put in front of us, and for the doctors treating both my little girls. That God will guide them and give them the wisdom, skill, and knowledge they need to do what is BEST for the girls.

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Thankful Tuesday

Today I am thankful for:

-My Father in Heaven who watches over me, guides me, loves me, and is always there.
-My daughters, who have amazing endless love.
-My daughters daddy, who is an excellent provider for the girls, still a wonderful friend to me, and doesn't let things scare him too easily, he just works the system and works it fast! Good to know that if it has to happen, he'll be able to be here, guaranteed already by the "powers that be" because this is a man that doesn't waste time!
-My BFF, who never lets me feel alone.
-My children's insurance, for being so great, making my life easier!
-My friends who care about me and NEVER stop trying.
-The snow, because it's beautiful and pure.

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B90, Day 29: I got Nothing

Honestly, this was 99% a genealogy list, and I truly was unable to pull a verse from it. I read it all though :)

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B90, Monday Morning Check-in, Day 32

Yeah, okay, I am behind, AGAIN. *sigh*

I'm actually typing this Sunday night, as a scheduled post. I am getting ready to sit down and watch the pro-bowl with my Bible in hand. I'm not that interested in the pro-bowl this year. Going into it I am reading Day 27 and SHOULD be doing or done with Day 31. SEVERAL days behind. I'm hoping to be able to post a better update after the game.

***EDIT*** As of bedtime I was done with Day 28 and moving onto Day 29. So in the morning I will have Day's 29, 30, 31, and 32 to do. I will just plow through whatever I can before leaving for work. ***END EDIT***
***morning edit*** I've finished Day 29 now. ***end edit***

My excuses for being behind:

Monday: Bug's MRI had me at Children's Hospital all day, I did get some reading accomplished but not enough. **Morning edit** It's 10:40 am and I just got off the phone with Bug's neurologist. Her MRI was NOT clear like we'd hoped. I'm shaking and I know I'm in shock. I can't explain it all right now, but he is referring us to the surgical team. It's not a sure thing that she will NEED or HAVE surgery, this is a precaution so they have seen her and we have met them just in case. Can you please all add this to your prayer lists?? Thanks ***end edit***
Tuesday: Peanut had an eye appointment and I was told she needed surgery, it has put me into a tailspin and I'm still recovering from it.
Wednesday: work from 10-4, splitting headache ensued, just not able to concentrate.
Thursday: out of the house very early, did some reading in the car while waiting on BFF to finish her test, but the was busy busy then at work.
Friday: Work.
Sabbath: Managed to actually get a day and a half's worth of reading done, have a blog to post about it, but haven't yet. :) that's about it.
Today: grocery shopping and much needed time relaxing. LOL

Peanut's eye situation really has my wheels spinning and I could use some extra prayers for God's guidance and wisdom on that. Here's the two posts that sum up the bulk of what's been going on: Peanut's Eye Appointment and More thoughts on Peanut's Eye's. But here's a really quick summary:

One of my twin daughter's "Peanut" has a wandering eye, it outwardly turns SOMETIMES. I asked to have her seen for it back in September after having NUMEROUS people point it out for about 18 months. She was given a poor prognosis but the doctor felt glasses would help. So we put her in glasses and saw her again in December. In December the doctor felt she'd degraded and wanted us to patch Peanut's "better" eye and come back in a month. We had to push off the appointment for an extra 2 weeks because Peanut was sick, so it was 6 weeks between appointments. Both the first 2 appointments were lengthy and I felt the doctor had given us a fair evaluation. THIS appointment however was VERY rushed and she pronounced with very little examination of Peanut that Peanut had degraded more and needed Surgery. She explained the risks, never ASKED if I was okay with this or needed to think about it or talk to anyone about it. And then practically PUSHED me out the door. I told her that Peanut HAD to see her Pulmonologist before ANYTHING could happen, Peanut has Reactive Airway Disease, and putting her out for surgery is RISKY to say the least. And she indicated that this was no problem, it would take a few weeks for her surgical assistant to be in touch anyway. Her assistant called less than 24 hours later.

I don't feel right about this. I just don't. The two posts listed above will give pretty good details about what happened, is happening, etc.

I know this is a little off the topic, but I really do need the prayers for this situation. Thank you so much ladies!!!! :)

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